Microsoft Decides We All Want Pizza Smelling Controllers

How many people remember when Microsoft spend half a billion on research and development for the Xbox One controller? Now, I know developing a console isn’t cheap. In fact, even with Nintendo using essentially old technology and chipsets designed by Nvidia, the Switch and its successor aren’t cheap to design, develop and then get on the shelves. However, I’m pretty sure no one spends quite as much as half a billion on a controller. 

So why did the Xbox One controller cost so much? Well, it’s because Microsoft thought it would be a great idea to have the controller create different smells depending on what was happening in game at that moment. That’s the kind of batshit crazy ideas you’d expect from Willy Wonka. Or a 5 year old kid. I have no idea if this technology ever came to fruition because the end result was a controller that looked like a controller. 

That all changes today… to a degree. Microsoft has obviously remembered it spend millions on this technology, and thought a controller that smells like pizza must be an immediate success. What could possibly go wrong!? Apart from the fact it probably smells of mouldy cheese, meat and puke. And the fact it’s not even for sale, it’s just a prize is beyond head scratching! But we can always count on Microsoft to release a new monthly variant of their controllers to the point of asking, do Xbox fans want new games or just accessories?

Just look at this thing. LOOK AT IIIIIITTTTTT!!! Why!? Why would anyone do that!? It’s just… what the heck is wrong with some people!?

Im gonna have to rethink everything I thought I understood about… everything. 

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